Second Silk the Third [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
In hiding from an imaginary friend

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Last Post [13th August , 2010|06:28 pm]
This will be the last post on this journal.

I don't know whether I still have any readers, but just in case, I thought I'd announce it.

You can follow me on dreamwidth and livejournal with the same name. Posts are not locked and anonymous commenting is usually allowed. I also have dreamwidth invitation codes, if you want one.

This is the mess inside my head [10th August , 2010|07:01 pm]
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[Mood | contemplative]

I was off sick yesterday, even though it's not a normal work day. That meant that I did't have to do anything except watch the West Wing and desultorily write fic. I think I added about sixty words to the current [community profile] kink_bingo project, which puts me right in the middle of the sex scene. Urgh! I have no idea how to make it interesting, or sharp, because all the happens is okay, this is explicit ) I don't like the way the fic is weighted to the sex scene.

This morning I started work on the current art project, because I need to have examples of my work together by the end of the month to put in my submission for the Midsumma festival art exhibitions. I've been telling people that I'm putting together a submission for Midsumma, and no one has either asked what it is (the queer arts festival in Melbourne at the end of January/start of February that includes Pride), or reminded me that it's the queer festival. There's a whole sort of complete lack of making a deal about sexuality in my life.

Family and coming out and pronouns )

So that's the current news of Lex. I did five hours of baby-sitting on Saturday. The going rate is half as much again what I was asking (bonus!), and my arms still hurt from pulling a nine month old up onto her feet so she could practice walking around.

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Book One: The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms. [3rd August , 2010|05:12 pm]
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Yes, this is the first publish book I've finished reading this year

The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms by NK Jemisin

Not spoiler-y for events/narrative, only my reaction )

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Icons: Strictly Ballroom [27th July , 2010|09:09 pm]
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[Mood | accomplished]

This is for my [community profile] kink_bingo square "Mirrors".

Most are literal mirrors, but then I started to play around with the concept of reflection and recognition and the way that the film plays with contrast.

Feel free to take and manipulate any of these, add text of whatever (I'm really bad at thinking of text for icons). Credit is nice, but not expected. All comments are welcome; I'm still new to Photoshop.

(How do I get the DW posts to list the crosspostings?)

Thirty three icons )

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The things you teach yourself [26th July , 2010|09:50 pm]
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If I vote for Federal Labor, it will be because Penny Wong corrected herself to use "woman" instead of "lady" to refer to the person who asked her a question in Q&A. It's a pity that their policies are homophobic and transphobic.

L cannot bring himself to vote Green. I can't bring myself to vote Labor. We both understand the other's position. (Actually, Penny Wong's defence of Labor's position on gay rights made up a lot of ground with me for federal Labor. Still not voting State Labor.)

I'm retagging all my posts. This means at the very least scanning each of them. It's fascinating in a way that is confronting. All the things in my life and my mentality that I am worried about and that I feel I just need to get myself together about and get over have been worrying me for years.

I actually have called the counselling service now. I'm expecting a call back to discuss my needs: possible depression or anxiety; ongoing unhappiness, apathy, and lack of engagement; questioning my gender identity and desire to pursue transition. (I'm not sure how far I want to pursue transition, but I definitely want to step onto that path.)

I'm posting this because I am open to questions of any or all of these things.

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Oh, the joy [12th July , 2010|07:12 pm]
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Dear self,

Here is a list of things you could be doing instead of reading things that make feel angry and desperate:

Write more on a [community profile] kink_bingo fic. That one you like, or the one that is easy, or the one that's about food.

Write some Atlantis Big Bang, which is going to awesome and appreciated even if it isn't finished in time or never gets that long.

Sort your photos to have them ready to print when you go into town on Thursday.

Use up the remaining 10 GB of downloading available for the next four days.

The thing that pissed me off was The New York Times saying that transpeople should disclose their trans* status on dates. The link goes to Questioning Transphobia, which has a good write up and safe comments.

One of the problems with discussing trans* issues is that cis-people who aren't close to any trans* people (and sometimes even those who are) argue from the basis of a hypothetical situations of their own imagining that they do not make clear or explicit (and probably aren't quite aware of). So people who say "yes, I would feel betrayed if a long term romantic partner hadn't told me they were trans," have imagined a situation in which the lack of disclosure is a betrayal. They are making a tautological argument based on their assumptions about what transsexuality means for the hypothetical trans*person in their head (a picture which is informed by ignorance as well).

Also, I have to remember to never read the letters page of the paper.

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[10th July , 2010|09:18 pm]
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I remembered yesterday that when we studied Shakespeare in English, I always wanted to be picked to read the male parts. I read Antony, Iago, Tybalt, Dogberry. I can't believe that I'd forgotten that. In my head, when I stepped onto stage to say my lines, I was a man. (Also, I so would have been Viola in Twelfth Night.

I have about six half done [community profile] kink_bingo fics, including one that I've just started rewriting from a completely different narrative angle. Hopefully it will work out this time! Avoiding pronouns is difficult! Much Ado fic is stalled, mostly because I think it will be interest to no one but me. I have three plot bilbies for my "free space" centre square. *eye roll*

We are currently winning the footy. L is anxious, P is making nasty comments about the opposition.

I am on the sixth idea for my Atlantis Big Bang fic. This current idea is so completely self-indulgent it would be embarrassing if I didn't think it was so awesome. SGA seems to be the fandom of self-indulgent elseworld AUs. I love it.

*I was going to use Philistine, but I suspect that that is a problematic term. Also, muggle deserves more use.

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